divine deception!!

once upon a time, in a far far land, three monks decided to master the power of walking on water!!

So they sat down together beside a lake and started meditating. After some time one of them got up and started walking towards the lake. miraculously he was walking on water without his feet dipping and crossed the lake without drowning!!

Then the second monk got up and started walking towards the lake!!And to the awe of the third monk he also crossed the lake without going more than an inch in the deep lake!!The third monk thought that since he has also meditated for the same time as they did. He also had the power to walk on water. So he got up and approached the edge of the lake. But the moment he stepped in it, he fall. Disappointed he cursed the other two and the god's partiality!!

The other two monks just laughed across the lake. The second monk then said to the first one.."do you think we should tell him where the stones are!?"

So whats the thing!!?? Wherever there's magic, it not always god who intervenes, its deception most of the times!!So watch out, before you turn into a hopeless believer!!

train diaries

0023 hours
28th December
Second class coach, Gorakhdham express

A lady just offered me her seat. Although she has a baby with her, she still gave me her seat and is now lying on the train floor. That is the space between two berth rows where I was sitting before. This for me a great act of kindness and I feel extremely indebted to her.

Although she seems to have taken this decision so that she can sleep on the floor (which was not possible on the seat where she was sitting), I think she did it for me 'coz I cuddled her baby when he was crying some moments before. Previously I was sitting at her knees on the floor, which is way dirty. This coach is crowded beyond capacity and its cold. I am alone here and going to lucknow to meet a friend.

So now that I am sitting on her seat, my hands are free and I can write this.
Thanks to her
I owe you ma'am!!

INCIDENT OF THE NIGHT

New Delhi Railway station
Platform No. 11
2120 hours
27th December

The tarin Gorakhdham Express came into view at the far end of the platform. I tried to shook my sleepishness and get into action, now that my train was here after a long wait. A large swarm of people started to converge, where they suspected the doors of second class coach to stop. I wondred how different it used to be when I travelled with my father with a reservation ticket in hand. Some people infact started running in the direction of the incoming train to get into it while it was in motion and grab a seat while others were waiting for it to stop.

But soon after, everyone started moving toward to the coatch rather than the coatch to come to them. I followed. As the train came to a crawl, the doors were stuffed with people trying to get in simultaneously, while those outside running with the train, holding on to each other, forming a delta at the door. I was among them.

then suddenly I noticed a woman, half her body in the cack between the train and the platform, being dragged along, crying for help. Her cry was diminished by the shrieking of train wheels and noone was noticing her as they were looking striaght up at the doors and how to get inside. I was standing a little away from her in the direction of train. So it was like she came to me while being dragged. Since I was not moving now as it was just too much for me to see. My mouth ajar, the huge crowd coverging to where I was as the train kept moving. By instinct, I jumped into the delta, while being pushed got to the bottom of the door, grabbed that woman by her arms and pulled her up. As I was doing it, I was overwhelmed by the consciousness that I was saving a life.

As I pulled her up, staggering with her as the crowd collided with us as if nothing was happening and we were just obstacles to them. I let her go off my grip. Realizing she was fine and safe, I ran for the doors again. Behind me she suddenly started screaming like hell, repeating how close she was to being crushed by the train. Some people around started asking what happened.

I thought of turning back and let her see her saviour, but then I thought that what was to be done was done and it was over. I had a smile on my face and that was too too much for me for one evening. I wondered how cheap is life among the poor of our country. Today I was going to travel with them Although I belonged to a lower middle class family, I've never been this close to life and death before.

I dont know whether my doing this made any difference, but I thank god for giving me the strength and the opportunity to do this.

Thanks god.


ATMOSPHERE INSIDE THE SECOND CLASS COACH OF A TRAIN

0115 hours
28th december
2nd class coach , Gorakhdham express

Its fifteen minutes past one but still many people are having animated talks all around me. Like a group of people talking on some topic, everyone giving their own views and experiences. It's astonishing, how people adapt themselves in a harsh and dingy enviroment like this. The train is moving at such high speed, ts damn cold. There's not even an inch left in this crowded coach.

Most of the people are sleeping or trying to sleep in twisted postures. It's hard to think how a person can relax in such a state let alone sleep. Someone said it right, humans are capable of great feats once they abandon their dignity or their condition forces them to adapt. Adapt to survive. Its hard to think about this side of life.

People are sprawled up on the floor, stacked on the seats, luggages hanging in mid air. It reminds me of those old movies depiecting the condition of india at the time of partition. I dont feel like sleeping but am sure that sleep will grip me somewhere down the line in the 6 hour journey left to reach lucknow. Sometimes I miss home, get deperessed and feel like nothing's gonna be alright.

But then kittie gives me the reason to be happy, a reason why I am doing what I am doing.
God Bless her
ILUAB

into the wild...

To start with, I am a big big fan of this movie...I mean, I have never been moved by any other movie in my life as this one. I mean, the depth and the pace is just right to give you a feel of ultimate involvement.
The first thing that gets you
involved is the fact that the protagonist is a college graduate which I'll be in a few years..!!!. And the next thing is that he leaves his home without telling anyone for alaska...that's his dream place.....that's where he wants to go...but on his way....he makes so many friends, experiences the world, the people...the tramps....he calls himself Alexander Supertramp..

I like that sequence in which he talks to the apple he's eating after a long day of trekking through the mountains and appreciates it so much.

'...you are so tasty, so organic...you are the apple of my eye..!!!'

He says the last line really well, taking the half-eaten apple close to his eyes and winking!! That was humorous really!!. Then his relationship with the old, ex-american soldier, who lost his wife and son in an accident and suddenly comes across alex...was really and truly emotional. He makes everyone happy, he meets on his way, but himself suffers the consequences of being out in the cruel world without anything but bare necessities and novels. Like, when he was thrown out of the train and beaten badly, it was quite painful. Another saying from the movie was quite inspiring...

'sometimes in life, it's not necessary to be strong but to feel strong...'

really.. although all of us have somewhere heard this before, but the way it was delivered was amazing...His stay in the 'magic bus' was the most intense and touching thing about the movie...he enjoys it first, then problems come up..he's running out of food, it's cold....all alone among the mountains, he can't continue his journey, spends the time introspecting and reading novels, trying to figure out whether he has achieved what he set out for....but finally when he decides to return he finds that the snow has melted and his way back has been blocked by the mighty river which was nothing but a narrow stream when he came here in the winters...he is disheartened, tries to get himself together but starts losing hope, after all, he's also a human....starts hunting...regrets killing one of the stags as the bulk meat starts rotting ...tries to consult his novels and a few guides on edible plants...but mistakenly, takes poisonous plants and ultimately dies due to that...His last realization was...

'happiness is complete only when shared'

....which was the most touching, because he finally realizes the mistake he did, the grief he caused to his family and to the people he was close to, during his journey...His last moments were the most emotional and heart-melting, I've ever experienced...

Talking about the music...it was Eddie Vedder at his best...the soundtrack, 'hard sun' and 'long nights'..are just too addictive. Hats off to the movie and the director, Sean Penn....

jalpari

I recently heard the song 'jalpari' by Atif Aslam...Most of my friends don't like the beats of it; they say its too repetitive and frustrating; but I find it to give me something which is known as 'music orgasm'...; yup it sounds weird, almost gayish...but still I couldn't find a better lay man term; it probably describes something which makes you forget everything else and lose yourself into the song; gives you the feeling that you are drifting..!!


Also it made me conscious of the term, 'jalpari'....or the underwater angel....wow, i appreciate atif's imagination (if he hasn't copied it obviously..)....i wonder from where he got the inspiration...but the word brought an image of a charming young creature with a very beautiful young face and with fins instead of legs...moving swiftly towards you, deep into the deepest ocean....with ghostly white skin, almost transparent, godly....flowing, slightly golden hair...she's gazing with her eyes which is the most beautiful thing you've ever seen.. green or blue, you cant tell....you are too mesmerized to think..her stare makes you fell in heaven, like you have nothing to worry about now....her soft and tender hands swiftly pass your face, almost touches it...gives you very subtle warmth in the ice cold water..you almost feel her....close your eyes.....you crave for more and try to reach out for her.....but your body becomes stiff, the pressure of water above you feels like all the ocean...you watch her as she starts fading away in the dark waters.....with her body radiating an aura of light and as she recedes, her figure starts dissolving into the hazel of liquid....and the light slowly fades away.....

I wish i could meet one for real....they say, you enter that world when you die....i'll wait until the day i die...but till then I am content with the beauty of this world where I am presently living...and want to enjoy its equally beautiful details and the metaphysical cachets....

a strange meeting....

yup,

So today a very strange thing happened to me. For the first time in weeks I was free in the evening (well, that’s not where the strange thing ends.. :P) I go for classes these days in a summer internship program by a robotics company and believe me, it’s an awesome experience to be there and attend lectures by mind blowing individuals like Shallabh sir and Toshi sir.

But today I returned early at noon, had a nap till evening. And since I was feeling a little stressed , I decided to go out for a walk. Nobody was at home at the time, so I took the keys and went down the road. I hadn't decided on where I wanted to go. I just kept walking to wherever the boulevard(..of broken dreams) was taking me . And suddenly realized, that I have reached the tilak nagar market. Market..Market!!!...Market?!!?, I started thinking, what was that I need to buy.

Then it came to me that a data cable and getting my mobile repaired was in my top priority listings for that weekend. And that’s how I landed up at the District Center. After reaching there I started shuffling through the shops for a data cable. The prices were sky high and certainly out of question considering my pocket size And that’s where the story begins.

So I decided just to take a veg surprise from McDonald as a souvenir. I bought one and since it was really crowded inside (I hate crowded places), I went out and sat on one of the railings enclosing the little green patches of grass scattered all over the main floor. Then suddenly out of the dynamic silhouette of twilight(""I can’t believe i just said that"""), a figure sat beside me and startled me by saying, “hey i need your help”!!

His first glance was that of a smart young man, with glasses on, unshaven for sure, middle class by his outfit and with a smelling air around him. Apart from that, he looked studious, like a book worm. He was talking in English anyways. Nonetheless, considering the status of GAY hood being legalized recently, i raised my eyebrows(”no thanx”)

“I need your help. I haven’t had anything to eat since morning. Can you help me”. I looked down at my hamburger and the two intersecting semicircle cuts, which were the two bites residing in my belly at present. He can’t be a beggar. He wasn’t in rags at least. But when I looked carefully, he wasn’t well dressed at all. As an instinct, I replied. “O really!!!even I haven’t eaten anything and this is the first edible object in my possession since morning”.

He looked at me with indifference. “Oh it’s fine then. Actually, I am a jobless person. I wander around here all day looking for some pity in the hearts of men” ("as if women don’t have hearts")

“But you look so fine. What are your qualifications...”

“Oh well, I have done my matriculation”

The last word looked familiar, but I still asked ” ….as in 12th,…right??”

“no, it’s 10th….it sounds bad when you say 10th…” and then he started leering.

yah, and look at me!!!, why the hell am I sitting here. I like company. But why on earth am I sitting with this strange jobless and homeless(probably), english speaking freako at the DISTRICT CENTRE……haaannnnnnnn????

“But you speak good english”, I wondered.

“yeah, that’s why I tried at BPO’s for a call center job. But was rejected. “

“What happened after 10th, why did not continue??”

“I had to leave for surat due to my grand father’s death, I was afraid I would loose my share of his property and that’s what happened, my sister took all that,.. although she has given me a small share but wants me to stand on my own, i mean i am not totally jobless, I was offered to do a watchman nearby, at 1500 a month ”

Sounds good enough…. “but better something than nothing”, I said.

“O common… just think, if you add 40 bucks for your food per day, it comes to 1200, and then there are clothes, hair oil, soap and a freaking place to live”

O yes, that’s an insight. I looked again at my hamburger waiting to be enjoyed…..that yyuuuummmm…. hamburger i had to make a decision, I started accumulating the parameters for both sides

1. ‘give him the damn hamburger’, this guy needs it, help the poor...dont you remember your morals, haven't your parents taught you anything??!...

2. shut the fuck up, i am hungry and that’s my freakin pocket money...man, आज वैसे ही mood ख़राब है!!...havent even bought a data cable, इतना सारा काम pending h..!!, ऊपर से ये जनाब पता नहीं कहाँ से टपक पड़े हैं!!

I suddenly gave him the hamburger considering that there were far too many parameters to process. Ok... done…..happy now??

“No, i can’t take it. You just said it is your first meal of the day”, he startled me for the second time.

“It’s Ok, i can buy myself another one”.. I managed.

He took the hamburger keeping it halfway between us and stared. (”what now!!!….do you want me to strip naked …..in front of all theseee freaking hooottiiieessss ……haaaaaaannnn?????”) “what now??”, i was getting frustrated by now.

“U take it back”, he said.

“No. I wont be able to eat it, now that I have met you”. Works both ways 'i pity you' and 'you stink man!!'.

“why…… am i so ugly” (”was that supposed to be ffuuunnnyyy….haaannnnn???”)

“blah blah blah, no you eat it I’ll buy another one for me”. Finally done.

“So what do you do by the way” i wondered at the question thrown at me, which startled for the third time. I started searching for an alias that could sound funny. then realized that the thing I do in reality is my best bet to sound funny

“I work for a robotics company and make robots”…haah…isn’t that funny.

He nodded and started thinking.

” I have also decided that, I am gonna start a business”….(”hah…now that’s funny”)

“But wouldn’t that require a lot of capital”.

“no….consider this….i start three पनवाडी shops” (that sell ciggrates, pan and mouth fresheners…blah, blah, blah)

“k.....!!!!!!!!!!!”

“can you imagine how मच a पान वाला over there manages a turnover of….”

“what…”

“1500 a day”

“o my god”

“yeah, just imagine three shops like that and you just sit and earn” (”and we are the motherf**kers studying our arse out all the time”)

“O, I couldn’t have imagined that”, I couldn't have ....seriously!!!!

“yeah you know what…. i closed my brother in a rehab” (”what….what…what….???????”)

“my brother was into drugs, i took him into a rehab” I stared at him now….he could be a drugger too….but this is for the first time that I am confronting a drug-addict or at least a brother of one. I had never imagined there was a rehabilitation center here at Delhi….suddenly an episode of ‘the big bang theory’ flashed in front of me and i saw that small skinny boy who had impersonated the drug addict in the comic episode.

“wow, so you actually have rehabs in delhi”, I was accttuuaalllyyy looking at him now

“yup it’s around sec 24, 25, rohini”

“So do you know how they treat them at rehabs”, I pondered.

“yup, when i used to go to meet my brother, he told me how it was” I was gaining a lot of interest by now. “they lock around 50 people in a large room, equipped with sanitary facilities and a kitchen and a hall ….you get up at 6, get ready by 7:30, and then you have yoga classes, then breakfast and then sessions “

“what kind of sessions”

“I dont know that much, but they try to cure them, they are not allowed to leave, it’s like a prison”

“oh my god” I watched him as he took his first bite eating. And I don't know what happened to me, but i got up and started to leave. “Ok brother, I gotta go to back to work now....boss is gonna be furious.. you enjoy the hamburger” he just gave a slight nod by tilting his head to his right.

He had the same indifferent stare. I turned around and started walking. It seemed odd to me. Our conversation was just getting better but subconsciously, my brain was telling me that “dude, something’s wrong here, m sure you din't wanna continue”!!

It could have been a prank!!!!

A bet between two college mates “100 bucks, if you could make that guy, give his hamburger to you” …sort of ...

It also could have been genuine. you know.... in a city like Delhi, anything is possible.

Whatever it was, it was one hell of an evening. A good detour from the monotone that sometimes clouds your life.